Wholeheartedly to me means dedicated. And dedication needs all that you’ve got. Your time, your energy, your heart and yourself.
The choice of caring for your family, I personally think it’s natural for a woman wanting to spend as much time as possible with her child. A natural caring sprung from the depth of her heart and soul. I see so many women feeling sad and getting into crisis when the time has come for baby to leave home and enter the day-care. That feeling is something that shouldn’t be normalized. It’s the instinct screaming inside any mother to keep her baby close. Why? Because we’re made that way.
If we look at almost any mammal species on earth we see the very same thing. God is love and love is unquestionable. We are all His creation and it is without a doubt meant to be this way. Working against this is working against the pure force of life.
Many men and women strive for professional success and one of the biggest things in this time in general is fulfillment. Quick fixes are to be found everywhere but the satisfaction this gives are most often fast passing. Why? Because they lack real value true to our nature. But a family, no matter of how it looks, people to love and a home means a never ending source of giving and receiving. Whilst buying something materialistic or doing something most often is about receiving without the part of real giving. And that does not satisfy in the deep.
”This is not what I want” I often hear people say about the possible choice of dedicating their life to caring for loved ones. For many this is something that don’t even exist or is seen as something very old-fashion and contra revolutionary that needs to be put down until it’s invisible. Once it’s invisible it’s easier to forget and replace with quick fixes. But is our free will and what we want something negative? I personally don’t think so, though what I do believe is that too many options is hurtful and what one may want isn’t necessarily the best or even good at all. This goes for both men and women with their differences. I’m also aware of that what we want sadly is often far from what we get. To stay home is a privilige not given to every one, but that doesn’t make it less important.
I’m aware of that not everyone lives in a family, and that circumstances are different to everyone. It is a given. There are many ways to be fulfilled for real, everywhere you can both give and receive love. But I’m not writing about every existing way. I’m writing from my own perspective as a traditional and somehow conservative housewife and I have my very personal standards.
One time in the past I got so burned by a man. He was 42, I was 25 with two small children and pregnant. He was my husband and treated both me and the children in very bad ways. I remember him holding our youngest son, by the time only 1 month old. I was going to a parents meeting. Dressed in a long skirt and a top as it was in the summer. With my baby’s body in his hands and as a tool, in front of my other two children he pushed me to the floor whilst saying how i looked like a whore. He made so many mean and hurtful things to us. In that way he was the one leaving us. But I had to protect myself and my children from him and changed the lock at the door as a first step.
When we first started dating I was a very strong believer and follower of Jesus Christ but as the time passed by I got more and more isolated from friends and family. I became depressed and got so lost that my faith faded. This is something that never could happen now as I know my self-worth and would never accept someone treated me or my children this way.
What I want to say with this is that I know how things and actions can turn your world upside down and change you completely. The way you look at things, how you prioritize and how you believe.
I have returned to my roots in more than one way and I will never go back to that horrible insecure and lost way of living my life. My faith is now strong and growing each day. And I rest in who I am as a woman. Now I know my own worth. I am important because I’m important to my family, God loves us and bless us, so we learn our purpose, duties and value between each other.
Now as I clearly see the light shining I just want to soak deeper and deeper into femininity. The more that I express this in my prayer and in every other way I feel my self become happier, more and more calm. Actually this grows stronger day by day, I don’t know if there’s an end to it, I doubt this feeling will ever leave me again.
I choose to stay home. To take care of my family full time in every way they need. And that includes I’m always ready to talk, engage, to give encouragement or comfort. To understand, to guide, to give in every way. There are days when I’m not needed more than for making dinner or folding shirts, these days are my vacation days, my alone-time and where I charge my batteries. We’re not financially rich, but I am completely fulfilled and when my living days has come to end. I won’t regret, and I won’t miss anything ♥️